I read a post on job hunting and came across something in the comments that caught my attention. The post itself suggested that “It’s OK to cry” when frustrated during a job search, and here’s what a commenter said in response:
It’s okay to do a lot of emotional things, but I would not put crying on my list of things to do when looking for a job. And if I have to be told it’s okay to cry, then I need more than job counseling. Bottom line, cry if you want, but it’s irrelevant to whether or not you will be more or less employable. This may sound insensitive, but I’ve had more than a few bumps in the road, personally, professionally and health-wise. Crying over one’s woes is self-pity and I have no time or patience with that.
Wow — now that is harsh.
Crying is a natural response to sadness, to loss, to pain. It is not whining, nor should a person feel like emotions should have to be controlled by “having a stiff upper lip” or by “sucking it up.” For some, crying can be a good release of emotions that will then enable them to have a better focus on what needs to be done to get another job instead of being distracted by their feelings.
My biggest beef with this comment is that there is zero tolerance for individuality. Some people are naturally emotive; others are stoic. Some people have been laid off for two weeks; others have been laid off for two years. Some people worked for 10 years at their jobs and loved their places of employment; others were looking for a way out of their work situation. Because of those (and other) differences, the methods in which the ebb and flow of emotions are handled will vary from person to person.
Let me be clear: I am not suggesting that it’s OK for a person to cry for hours on end, to go on crying jags most days of the week, or to have break-downs in public. That would be excessive, and I would strongly recommend that anyone who is feeling despondent about their employment status should talk with a professional who can help work through those issues. Depression will derail your efforts to find work, so it needs to be dealt with.
So you feel the need to cry once in a while? I say, “Yes! It’s OK to cry!”
What do you say?
Image courtesy of brokinhrt2
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